In The Trenches

Soldiers are still cool, right? Kids still like 'em? Actually, let me check. *Checks the internet*. Woah. WOAH. People sure are vocal about their political opinions on the web. Yeah, well, still. This game will change their minds. That's how cool it is. And we've already made it. It's done. We can't undo it. Also, these are cute cartoon soldiers. There's barely any violence involved. Just cartoon violence. That's PG. No problem, right? RIGHT?

So defend your position! Point the shooty things at the enemy! Pull the trigger! And all of it...

...

... wait for it...

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In the trenches!

... Really? No laughs? Like, at all? I... I did the thing. The thing where you put the game name on the game description. Yeah. Ok, I get it. Tough crowd. Just... just play the game already. You'll like it. I swear. It's good.

GAME FEATURES

-Defend your trench

When enemy soldiers come at you, you shoot them. And if they come for your tent, you shoot them double. Your tent is like, your home when you're in war. Home is important. That's why you're at war in the first place. To defend your home. Yeah, let's go with that.

-Charge to the next trench

And you do that so you can defend that next one. Whatever you think about soldiers, charges are definitely cool. They're heroic. They make the blood boil with excitement. Or maybe fear. I don't know. I've never been to war. This is not like that, though. It's just a game. Relax. Enjoy.

-Upgrade EVERYTHING

And with everything, I mean like the stuff that's upgradeable. Don't go around expecting to upgrade the size of the enemy soldier's heads. That would be funny though.